ADLANDS'      DIGEST
                     A Free subscribed Discussion List
                               of 16,811subscribers
                      on web marketing and promotion
               supported by AdlandPro World's Classifieds
                       at http://www.adlandpro.com
                         Bogdan Fiedur,  Publisher
                     mailto: Bogdan@softfornet.com
                         Vol. 1, #164,  Mar  22, 2000


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-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Topics in this issue:

         Sponsor Message
         Word from Publisher
         Success Story
        =====================

C o n t i n u i n g   D i s c u s s i o n s (3)
=============================================

1.)Adland Digest success story of the year questions
~ Ken Hylton

2.) Why Bother Giving Away Free Stuff?
~ Adrian Elman
~ Rafael Aguilo

3.) Fake and Misleading Advertising
~ Viv Abbott
~ Jessie Coughlin



N e w     P o s t s   (3)
==========================

1.)  Karen Clinchard
~ Your Contribution Please....

2.) Tom Houser
~ Domain name...

3.)  Phil Calvert
~ Good, business-friendly ISP?




Site Review Responses (1)
==========================
1. Toth, Laszlo

Site Review Requests (0)
===========================


G u e s t   A r t i c l e (1)
================================
The Truth about Website Marketing
By Brian Norris




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                                            ----===(*)===-----

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    Digest sponsorship info http://www.adlandpro.com/archives/Advertising.htm
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

================== Word from publisher ====================

Greetings All

Welcome  175 new subscribers who joined list since last mailing.



                                            ----===(*)===-----


I would like to thank you  everybody who responded  to my  request
for logo design for new free resources site called freebonanaza.com

Out of many interesting designs we've picked logo by
Melanie Jackson which can be seen here.
http://www.adlandpro.com/adimages/freebonanaza.gif

Melanie, your check for $200 will be sent tomorrow.

Also I would like to award $50 to Stephen  Serracino Inglott for
his proposals which  we might potentially use in the future.

Anybody else who  provided their designs, please contact me and
I will provide you with free promotion at AdlandPro for equivalent
of  $45 US for advertising or  $60 for search engine submissions
to  3,300 search engines.
Again thank you to everybody.



                                            ----===(*)===-----

Send your Success Story for  Adland Digest success story
of the year 2000 contest.
Visit link below to see winners of  Adland Digest success story 1999
http://www.adlandpro.com/adland_digest_success_story_of_the_year.asp
and read about rules and guidelines.

Winners of the first, second and third  place will be linked from each
AdlandPro Free World's Classifieds page throughout the  next year.

Exposure obtained from this promotion can be tremendous amount of
traffic to  winners of this contest.
AdlandPro receives 4,000 visitors with 20,000 page viewings daily.
Link to this page will be displayed 7,320,000 times during coming year,
not taking into account any traffic growth.

See this link for previous success stories.
http://www.adlandpro.com/archives/success.htm


                                        ----===(*)===-----

Great online discussions supported by www.AdlandPro.com
http://www.adlandpro.com/ActiveForum/
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Once you are there, post your free ad to section  "Bulletin Board".
When asked for user id and password for the first time, just
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==========S u c c e s s   S t o r y=============
From: "Harvey Turner" <holton@iswt.com>


Hello Bogdan:

Your recent request for success story submissions
 caught my eye.  I was intrigued by your questions
as to why you received so few submissions. I had
not even considered sending my story and I had to
ask myself why?  And I realized, my  reason
was  . . .

It isn't finished!

At least, I hope not.  However, I thought I share the
first few chapters of my story.  So here goes.

Wandering onto the Internet in 1996, I was one lost
puppy.  New languages, new ideas, new everything - in
fact a whole new world.  I was so lost I couldn't even
set up a web page on GeoCities.  As a result, I never
used a free server.

I learned html from a book.  Kind of a hit and miss
web page designer.  Several years later I'm still in
the learning mode.  I do design all of my own pages.

My first efforts on the Internet were to find leads
for my offline business.  I was involved in Artist
Development, Country Music in Nashville, TN.  And it
did work . . . however, that's not my success story.

I retired, left Nashville, and began looking for a
true Internet business.  Success, I discovered Associate
programs.  I signed up for 25-30 right away.  Boy was
I gonna be rich.

I wasn't foolish enough to design pages with nothing but
banners.  I mixed text, some content and a couple of
banners on a page.  I just couldn't seem to make any
money.  At one point I was convinced that these programs
were designed for failure.

After many months of no orders, minimal traffic and
confusion, I bought a book.  Within an hour I had a
good idea why associate programs weren't working for
me.  (Not that I'm a genus - the book was well written.)

I needed to specialize.  I learned that I should feature
one product (or program) on a page and work it until it
was successful.  So I set up a site within a site.  (We're
talking someone here who had very little money.)  I made
some sales.  I promoted some more and made more sales.
One & Only was the first program to show profits.

There was a formula after all!  I developed a niche within
a niche.  I took the singles concept a bit farther and
developed a site for Filipina girls that were featured
in One & Only.  That site profited.  As a program (or a
niche) began to support itself, I established a domain
for it.

Each time I developed a steady monthly income from a
program (or niche), I moved it to its own domain.  Of
course, this means developing the traffic to the new
site.  Not difficult since you've already done it with
the "site written a site" concept.  I don't close the
previous pages, I let them continue to profit.  I am
simply adding another "Doorway" to my profitable
program.

I've done this four times now, with three more domain
names waiting to break out.  As to how successful?
I clear about $500.00 a month.  Not a lot but some
standards, but since it is profit and each program
supports itself . . . it is success.

Well Bogdan, there you have it.  To date at least.
As I mentioned in the beginning, my success story
isn't completed . . . I hope.  There is more to
come.

Thanks so much for the opportunity to share my
little story and please, keep up the great work
with Adland.


""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""

Harvey Turner -Holton Media Services
Free Classified Ads - Free Links
http://www.holton.com




==========C o n t i n u i n g   D i s c u s s i o n (1.1)=============
From: "Ken Hylton" <khylton@planetc.com>
Subject:Adland Digest success story of the year questions.


Moderator Bogdan Fiedur wrote in digest  #162

>Last year I started  contest on Adland Digest Success Story of the
>year and  every  couple of  issues there was a  messages sent to the
>list with  personal success stories, which not only were  helping
>others in seeing how and what one needs to do to achieve some
>sort of satisfaction and recognition  but they were also generating
>traffic to sites of  success story publishers.
>I would like to know why  there is no new contributions for that
>contest.




Bogdan;

    I have been a subscriber for awhile and felt the urge to reply to your question
about why people are not entering your contest for success.  I can't speak for
everyone, but my success is just now starting and I was going to wait until I saw
tangible results before contacting you.  I think you have the right idea though,
people do like to read about other peoples' success and failures.

    I hope that I can contact you in the near future and share the success story of
the year.

    Thanks and keep up the "GREAT" work.


Ken Hylton



==========C o n t i n u i n g   D i s c u s s i o n (2.1)=============
From: "Adrian Elman" <int.res@tmedia.it>
Subject:  Why Bother Giving Away Free Stuff?

In response to: Why Bother Giving Away Free Stuff?

Gentlemen, at the risk of being accused of provocation I
wanted to address the freebie myth so that you can choose
whether you are in business to make money or not.

I have 23 years experience in marketing 10 of which were
teaching sales techniques to company sales forces. Even
with that under my belt, I wasted the last year using freebies
to get traffic to my site.

Here's what happened. My traffic shot through the ceiling and
today my site gets an average of 280,000 hits a month. Despite
that my sales were pitiful averaging around $100 to $140 a day.
It was only after reading a book by Jonathan Mizel that I realized
where I was going wrong...

Freebies have no value. If they did, nobody would give them away
free. You can compete with whoever you want in who is giving away
the most E-books but the bottom line is the more you give away, the
less credibility you have. Your E-books will be considered worthless.
Who bites all this free stuff? I am sorry but it is people with no
money available to spend. They come in droves and you get fooled
into thinking you are a success because your hit counter is spinning
so wildly...but what do these people do once they are on your site?
They search for everything that's free and then disappear again.
The net result is that you have wasted your time and advertising
dollars. So my site at http://www.int-resources.com was attracting
people continuously but nobody was spending.

I had already started a new project last June which was about to
come to fruition and having read Mr. Mizel's advice on not giving
away freebies but selling higher priced products, I launched our
new site at http://www.int-resources.com/main.htm one week ago.
Sales went berserk! I have not made less than $1000 a day since
and it's climbing. Please note that there isn't a freebie in sight and
so the people visiting are those that have money to spend.

The site contains nothing but products of massive value. Visitors
can see that and consequently buy. I tell you this because the
secret to success is not to just raise your prices and strip out the
freebies. You MUST be offering products or services that provide
genuine user benefits. The more useful, the better your chances of
making a sale. Your product needs to be pitched at a common
problem and provide an instant viable solution. Remove someone's
pain and all you'll see is gain.

In my case, I know that it is not so difficult to get people looking
at your product or opportunity but closing the sale or getting people
to take action is a completely different story! That's why my site
provides solutions to those problems. Is there a market for solving
such issues? You tell me!

Just take a look at all the most successful direct marketing ads on
TV. They always identify a problem and then provide a solution. I
remember the fishing tackle ad that showed how you can drastically
increase your chances of making a catch instead of spending hours
waiting for something to bite. They sold millions of their product all
over the world. Then there was the stick you could wipe over stained
materials and instantly that stubborn stain vanished. Today that
product is available in stores right across the planet. The formula for
these successes is identical....problem and solution.

In finishing, let me ask you this.... What problem does your freebie
solve and if it does solve something don't you think that being free will
make sure that nobody takes it seriously?

Regards,
Adrian Elman



==========C o n t i n u i n g   D i s c u s s i o n (2.2)=============
From: "Rafael Aguilo" <raguilo@concentric.net>
Subject:  (Why Bother Giving Away Free Stuff)


Hello Bogdan and Adlanders!

Sorry for the lateness of this reply. Health concerns
kept me from being online for a while.

On issue #163,
Jason Lamure <jlamure@yahoo.com>
writes:

>My first freebie is in exchange for subscribing to
my E-zine. Subscribers receive 10 free marketing
e-books.<

>Another idea I am trying out is my free Search
Engine Submission offer which I hope to use in my
efforts to build a successful paid to surf
organization.<

>Rafael, would you consider these sound strategies
for using freebies?<

Here's my 2 cents. Jason, I believe in saying things the way they are, so there are
no missunderstandings. (And you'll learn A LOT...FREE!)

I visited your site, and:

1. It doesn't have a "YOU" flavor to it. It could be one of a million sites. You have
to organize it better. What makes it
different from all the others?

2. You are trying to convince people that you can show them to make money and still,
your site is a free site. Big NO-NO.
The underlying message is: you can't pay for your
OWN domain! At today's prices, it's a steal! Check for
yourself here:
<www.OrderYourDomains.com/domains/domain.cgi?raguilo>

3. Why do you think people are going to subscribe to your newsletter (which you don't
bother to describe); if you don't tell them WHAT freebies they are getting? You know
what they are. They DON'T. Make that one of your selling points.

4. Why would they sign up with your Paid to surf program(s),. when they can use
gazillions of websites that have free submission forms? You HAVE to CREATE your own
"thing".

Don't think about what YOU want to do. Think about what THEY want to do; and GIVE it
to them!

ANYONE can join a paid to surf program with themselves as the Top Dog! The REAL
question is: Will THEY(or YOU) MAKE ANY MONEY?

Take it from one who's been there done that, and learned the hard way. Right now,
with this post, you are getting priceless,
upfront, blunt, No B.S. advice...FREE! (I've paid handsome money for it) USE IT!

If you want more, It's Yours for the taking. Just go to my website. It's free.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Rafael Aguilo helps the average 'Guy and Gal' make money online
using Free Stuff. And he shows you how... FREE!
<http://www.learninternetmarketing.com/idiot.htm>
It's The Idiot-Proof Way To Make Money Online!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------




==========C o n t i n u i n g   D i s c u s s i o n (3.1)=============
From: Viv Abbott <de@iol.ie>
Subject:  Fake and Misleading Advertising



Hello Everybody,

Yes, those goofy folk with their inane tricks are a real pain. They are
the unfortunate price one pays for posting either Classified Ads or on
FFAs. A real pain!

But there is worse, much worse out there, blatantly coercive, brazenly
misrepresenting their wares  - and robbing folk. We had a nasty encounter
with a wee man who boasted of a Harvard education (God help Harvard!) .
He plastered the web with an avalanche of  manipulative 'communication'
promoting his 'the world's most spectacular advertising package, a
$250,000 giveaway.

Well, needless to say, our Harvard wiseacre could not deliver. 'Someone' put
the finger on him and he withdrew - but did he rush to compensate those he
misled? You know the answer! Meanwhile, he sells web services b ut he thinks
he's a Realtor  - and charges accordingly!!!!

And how are we to interpret his 'Money Back Guarantee' plastered on
his website? Here's a wee man likes MONEY above all, clings to his
$6,000 (realtor fees!!! for a one page web with a few CGI scripts, freely
available all over the web) Ask his victims, mostly women, it would seem,
could they not get their money back?

Better still the No Fraud Network put up a web page describing his antics.
They had snappy quotes from his book where he advocated' bullying poking,
prodding,compelling, ' his victims in millions of
Jeff, having devoured his Mutt, attacked the web-host Tripod. He accused
them of slander and defamation. When it was pointed out that in fact the
content was merely a quote of his outpourings, he changed tack and shouted
'breach of copyright'! Tripod, who were merely the Web Hosts gave up at
that stage and web (temporarily) vanished.

Surely that little Harvard weirdo could behave with some smattering of
common decency? Wouldn't he feel he owed a debt to society for having
got a decent start in a place like Harvard? Or, would he have us believe
THIS is what he learned in Harvard? We wonder!

We're bringing out an E-BOOK. At least it will amuse the multitudes. At
best, it will save some unfortunate souls from the greasy paws of such as
our wee Harvard man.

Viv Abbott

------------------------------------------------------------------------
Celebrate PEACE and POETRY for the Millennium! An Irish
PEACE POEM in many languages for a global celebration.
URL http://www.irishpoems.com/earn.htm
mailto:webmaster@irishpoems.com
-------------------------------------------------------------------------



==========C o n t i n u i n g   D i s c u s s i o n (3.2)=============
From: Jessie Coughlin <ecoughlin@earthlink.net>
Subject:  Fake and Misleading Advertising


Dear Bogdan,
I have been receiving your newsletter for a long time. I always open it! however,
sometimes I read all of it, other times I become bored with the topics. Today I read
it all of it. Since 1993 I have seen just about everything there is to see in terms
of marketing advice online. Now I spend at least 2 hours of my precious time each day
doing nothing but deleting get rich schemes from my mail boxes without opening them!
I am sure that it is not  inappropriate to claim to be an expert on what doesn't
work! I turned that expertise into an income. Now I make my living protecting small
business owners from the myriad of GET RICH opportunities. All of my clients are
novices to the internet and are being dragged kicking and screaming by the pressure
to put their business online. It is very intimidating to many of them and for good
reason. My advice to some of you seasoned internet marketers, is to refrain from
overwhelming the unenlightened!
Some of us have been doing this so long, that we expect too much understanding from
those who are new to e-commerce, many of them are still looking for the "any key" or
have just learned how to turn on the computer without junior.  Unfortunately, these
vulnerable folks are the main target market for many of your readers and advertisers.
Help stomp out false advertising, expose the scammers and spammers! Have a special
"Alert" section in your newsletter and I will always open it! always read it!

Many thanks for several years of good advice!
GrumpyGuru


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Note from Editor.

Thanks for the suggestion.
I will be using Joseph Jobst's Newsletter GIM  which provides all this kind
of warnings.
Here below is  one (funny one) from a month ago.

**

  => Email Hoax
  (see also GIM#79 at  http://linz1.net/GIM.html )

  Spend any amount of time on the Net and you are bound to
  receive dozens of messages such as  "I'm a dying kid --
  please forward this email to the entire planet."
  As I've mentioned many times in the past, every one of
  these messages is a hoax.

  However, the "burlap boy" story is possibly the funniest
  parody of this type of hoax I have ever seen --
  If you want a good laugh, I strongly recommend that you
  read this story at:
http://www.zdnet.com/yil/content/depts/forward/fwd000125.html




B.F.





======================N e w    P o s t i n g (1)========================
From: Karen Clinchard <kclincho@yahoo.com>
Subject: Your Contribution Please....



Dear Bogdan,

I always look forward to reading your newsletters!
Thank you for all the time and effort you put into
them.

I am putting together an ebook, titled "Who's Clicking
Now!" about successful people on the internet and
would very much like your contribution. It's an ebook
about how people on the internet came to be on the
internet; your struggles, your successes, your
failures, your advice, etc.

This ebook will be offered to my readers and, of
course, you're welcome to include your ad in the copy!
 Your contribution can be up to 2 full printed pages.

If you would like to participate, please send your
contribution to Editor@infotrain.zzn.com with ebook in
the subject.  I would like to have all the material
together by April 15th if at all possible.


Thank you for your valuable time,

It's greatly appreciated!


Karen Clinchard
Editor, Cashing In! Newsletter


P.S. You'll find back issues of Cashing In! at this
url:
  http://www.infotrain.bizland.com/info.html


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Note from Moderator.

Karen  check this page, which has links to Adland Digest success stories
from the last year. I'm sure that you will be able to reuse them after
asking their  authors for permission.
I'm mentioning this because last year I had  some of the contributors
finding their success stories on other websites, used to support
services or products for which they  were not intended.
http://www.adlandpro.com/archives/success.htm

B.F.


======================N e w    P o s t i n g (2)========================
From: Tom Houser < THouser762@aol.com>
Subject: Domain name...



Hello,

I've been a subscriber for a long time and this is the first time I've
posted. One thing I've learned from this digest is that it pays to have your
own domain. Well, I have a domain name now but what do I do next? I have
content for the website but what do I need to do? I'm sure that someone can
steer me in the right direction.

Thanks,

Tom Houser

---------------------------------------------------------------
Where will you be in 2 years?
http://www.pcpowersystem.com/id/7594801-1/tour.html
------------------------------------------------------------------




======================N e w    P o s t i n g (3)========================
From: Phil Calvert <pcalvert@netzero.net>
Subject: Good, business-friendly ISP?


Hello fellow Adlanders,

I am using PECLink as my ISP, and I am looking for a new one.  At first it
was fine, but lately it has deteriorated.

BTW...
ISP = "Internet Service Provider."  That's what you use to connect to the
Internet from your computer.  Some of the more well-known ISPs are AOL,
Compuserve, Mindspring, Earthlink, etc.  I included AOL in the above list
because it's well-known, though I don't really consider it a real ISP
(what works with any normal ISP often won't work with AOL).

Anyway, I am looking for suggestions.  Preferably, they should be
business-friendly.  I'm not exactly sure what that means, but if an ISP
blocks you or disables your account because you tried to send to your
mailing list of 100 people (for example), that is definitely NOT a
business-friendly ISP (I have heard of this happening).

Sincerely,


Phil Calvert

----------------------------------------------------------------------
The Age of the Electronic Secretary is HERE!
One Phone Number, Over 100 FEATURES!
The Leader in Unified Messaging Technology
For details, send a blank e-mail to:
     mailto:esainfo@sendfree.com
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

================Site Review Response==================
From: "Toth, Laszlo" <thlacus@freemail.hu>

Hello Adlanders and Linda,

Linda Laubenthal requested her site to be rewieved. I've seen it.
Short: less would be more !

Dear Linda I've downloaded your site and some changes I've
made to it. If youe write me, I'll send you my suggestions.
(Not only speak around, do something for her success !?)
best regards: laszlo (leslie) toth (thlacus@freemail.hu)



-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Please Support Our Sponsor~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


===================G u e s t   A r t i c l e (1)=====================
The Truth about Website Marketing
By Brian Norris, Marketing Expert, www.briannorris.com

There's an awful lot of bologna out there about how to market your site. I say, Don't
believe the hype!!!

If you're selling stuff like books, tapes and low-cost products (under $50), then you
should look at your website venture as an online gold mine. If, however, you are the
primary product or you offer services that require your buyers to make significant
investments, don't rely on the Internet to make you millions.

Here's the real deal:

1. People don't deliberately surf the Internet to find expensive creative geniuses
(like me) or expensive products or services.

People surf the Internet for information. They want fast access to relevant
information that will quickly improve their life or answer an immediate need. Right
now, there are tens of thousands of entrepreneurs, business owners and sales
professionals trying to get the attention of the same people you are. Quite often,
you can't compete directly. But you can out-niche, out smart and out position.

Use your site as an opportunity to educate prospective buyers, establish your brand
name and to disqualify people who can't afford your fees. Your goal must be for your
visitors to send you an email, fax you or pick up the phone NOW!

So never tell 'em everything you know. Let them know that they can get "the rest of
the story" via special report, autoresponder or by just talking to you via telephone.
When they call, take the time to establish a relationship and identify the core
reason that made them take action. This information will tell you what's working on
the site and more importantly it will tell you what you have to say or do to close
the deal!

2. Generally, people don't want to pay for information on the Internet.

Call me cheap, but I know, that with a little detective work, I can find virtually
anything I want for FREE. So unless you offer something really unique or
one-of-a-kind -- stuff you can't get anywhere else, your chances of getting rich
overnight are slim.

3. Unless you promote offline and push people to your site, you will always get a
lousy return on investment (ROI) on your site.

Companies like Yahoo, Monsterboard, Amazon and E-bay have spent millions to create
awareness and build their brand identities. If you don't have millions, then don't
dismay. Just be sure that every letterhead, envelope, business card, article, special
report, postcard, fax cover, notepad, newsletter, magazine, one-sheet, flyer,
advertisement, radio or TV spot must make mention of your web site.

Most of the search engines take at least 2 months to post your site on their
directory. And, their requirements change all the time. Although it's important to
resubmit your site regularly to the top ten sites, most of us can’t afford to wait
around for someone to magically find us. So take prospective buyers by the hand and
lead them to your site. If you'd like to submit your site to the top search engines
for free then go to www.briannorris.com/freesubmissions.htm

4. You need to 86 your free web pages and free email address.

You can't afford to skimp on certain things and this is one of them.

Think about it, when you see a web address that reads
http://www.myfreepage.com/freepage2/spelcastor/marketing/herman10345, (not a real
address) do you automatically say winner or loser? Expert or charlatan? For $70 a
year you reserve a website name with Network Solutions. And for about $20 a month you
can get your own website from any number of hosting companies.

Hotmail, Juno and AOL addresses are fine for personal transactions or if your
customers are the general public. If you work with corporations or associations,
however, these email addresses can automatically brand you as an amateur. And just
because everyone else uses AOL doesn't make it right. It's like driving up in a Pinto
while your competitors drive up in a Mercedes. Perception, Perception, Perception

When you choose the names of your site and web address, keep 'em short. People are
generally lousy typists. So the more letters they have to input, the greater room for
error. A colleague of mine has an email that reads georgemcdermott@millenniumage.com
The average person can't spell McDermott, let alone millennium. George should have
gone with george@MA.com. or www.1000years.com (which unfortunately is already taken).

5. Finally, update you site on a regular basis. Add new articles, run contests,
Solicit feedback, exchange links with other businesses (in different industries, post
press releases, revise and make your site better. Can you make it load faster? Can
you make the copy more compelling (if you can't, call me :))? What ever you do, don't
get complacent. Educate your buyers and don't forget to ask for the order … several
times!

If you're on a budget, learn to build your own site and just build it. We use a
combination of FrontPage 98, Quark Express Beyond Press, Netscape Composer and even
Publisher98. It's not rocket science.

Then, when you're ready to make your image/copy/graphics sparkle and to get the word
out that you're online, call 954-236-4834 and ask for Brian, or email
expert@briannorris.com. If you're rich, and don't have time to do-it-yourself, then
definitely call me.:)

Brian Norris
Marketing Expert * Professional Speaker * Creative Genius
Voice: 954-236-4834 * Fax: 954-236-2474
E-mail: expert@briannorris.com
Learn to earn more, live more and love more at  www.briannorris.com


======================Joke of the Day=====================
Taken from Joke a Day


Jon was in his usual place, sitting at the table, reading the
paper during breakfast. He came across an article about a
beautiful actress who was about to marry a football player who
was known primarily for his lack of IQ.

He turned to his wife with a look of bewilderment on his face.
"I'll never understand why the biggest jerks get the most
attractive wives."

His wife replies, "Why, thank you, dear!"


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